This week, I'd like to talk about balance. Specifically the balance between family, work, and passions. As a quick note before we begin, please note this this is my personal story and applies to me, and it may not be applicable to your situation.
To start, I probably should give a brief overview of my history as a writer and author.
I've been writing seriously with the intent for publication for about six years now. Before that when I wrote, it was always the pipe dream of one day... maybe... I'll get published.
In 2013, I had a very introspective moment/life crisis, and I decided to be more active in my pursuit of being published.
That year, I self published my (now removed) short story, Entertaining Angels. Then, the next year, I self published To Tread the Narrow Path as a serial novel on Amazon and had the last installment drop two years ago. In between then and now, I've had short stories published in WolfSinger Publications's anthologies (five in total), I started a YouTube channel (which I haven't uploaded to in over a year, but I'll get to that later), I've participated in NYC Midnight's Short Story Challenge 2019, and I've worked on my novel here and there. All the while, I've also maintained a full time job and made sure that I'm not ignoring my family.
For the longest time, I thought of all of this as a balancing act. At every job I've held, there's always been someone talking about how you have to strike the perfect "work/life balance." Find that happy medium where you walk a thin line between your family obligations and your duty to work.
So, when I started to really dive into writing, trying to pump out finished products to send out to publishers and agents, I thought I needed to make sure my balancing act included a third element- passions. I imagined it like a pie chart with three sections, all demanding equal effort on my part to keep that balance in my life. I thought I needed to fight to keep them in equilibrium.
Wow. Was I wrong. I was pouring myself into producing content for my YouTube channel, working on my novel, working on short stories, all while keeping up with my day job and my family. In short, I was burning myself out. I saw all the amazing indie authors I know that were able to churn out completed novel after completed novel, and I thought I could do that.
But I couldn't. That's not how I'm wired. Some people are. Some folks don't have a problem hitting 100K words out during NaNoWriMo. I tried to treat my writing like a job. Schedule time for it. Have a word count goal. If I didn't hit it, I'd have to make up for it on another day.
My actual writing style is very sporadic. I will have a spurt of creative fire and I'll pop out 20k words in two days, then not be able to write for a week afterwards. I'm not good at consistency, but I let that internal struggle affect the other parts of my pie. Fighting to keep that perfect balance caused me to let other parts slip in quality.
So, what's my solution now? I just let it flow. I prioritize. The most important things, my mental well being and my family come first, then I let the chips fall where they may for the other things. I write when I feel like writing. I'll get back to producing videos on YouTube when I feel like it. I engage my passions when I want now, not based on some idea of forced balance or forced creativity.
Don't get me wrong- those that have a goal and manage to hit that on a daily basis- I commend you, and sometimes (only sometimes) do I wish I could be more like you, but for the most part, I'm enjoying living my life, spending time with family, and writing when that tickle hits the back of my brain.
What I'd encourage anyone who is a creative type, is don't let someone convince you that you have to create based on some prescribed notion of how it should be done. You do you. Create on your own terms.
There's no right answer on how you should balance your life and your own goals. You have to find what works for you and for your life.
Can you write 1000 words a day and finish 3 novels a year? Awesome! Keep it up!
Can you only manage to scratch out a few scenes a week, and you are struggling to finish your first novel? Not a problem. It's not a race or a competition. Keep it up!
Find your own balance. Keep plugging away at your creative efforts, but stay mentally healthy. I look forward to one day seeing what you create.
Thanks for reading. Be sure to comment down below or on whatever social media you found this on to let me know your thoughts.
If you like reading my stuff, and you want to help support my writing habit, I've signed up for Ko-Fi, which is like an online tip jar. So, no pressure, but if you are feeling so inclined, I would appreciate any amount.
For the longest time, I thought of all of this as a balancing act. At every job I've held, there's always been someone talking about how you have to strike the perfect "work/life balance." Find that happy medium where you walk a thin line between your family obligations and your duty to work.
So, when I started to really dive into writing, trying to pump out finished products to send out to publishers and agents, I thought I needed to make sure my balancing act included a third element- passions. I imagined it like a pie chart with three sections, all demanding equal effort on my part to keep that balance in my life. I thought I needed to fight to keep them in equilibrium.
Wow. Was I wrong. I was pouring myself into producing content for my YouTube channel, working on my novel, working on short stories, all while keeping up with my day job and my family. In short, I was burning myself out. I saw all the amazing indie authors I know that were able to churn out completed novel after completed novel, and I thought I could do that.
But I couldn't. That's not how I'm wired. Some people are. Some folks don't have a problem hitting 100K words out during NaNoWriMo. I tried to treat my writing like a job. Schedule time for it. Have a word count goal. If I didn't hit it, I'd have to make up for it on another day.
My actual writing style is very sporadic. I will have a spurt of creative fire and I'll pop out 20k words in two days, then not be able to write for a week afterwards. I'm not good at consistency, but I let that internal struggle affect the other parts of my pie. Fighting to keep that perfect balance caused me to let other parts slip in quality.
So, what's my solution now? I just let it flow. I prioritize. The most important things, my mental well being and my family come first, then I let the chips fall where they may for the other things. I write when I feel like writing. I'll get back to producing videos on YouTube when I feel like it. I engage my passions when I want now, not based on some idea of forced balance or forced creativity.
Don't get me wrong- those that have a goal and manage to hit that on a daily basis- I commend you, and sometimes (only sometimes) do I wish I could be more like you, but for the most part, I'm enjoying living my life, spending time with family, and writing when that tickle hits the back of my brain.
What I'd encourage anyone who is a creative type, is don't let someone convince you that you have to create based on some prescribed notion of how it should be done. You do you. Create on your own terms.
There's no right answer on how you should balance your life and your own goals. You have to find what works for you and for your life.
Can you write 1000 words a day and finish 3 novels a year? Awesome! Keep it up!
Can you only manage to scratch out a few scenes a week, and you are struggling to finish your first novel? Not a problem. It's not a race or a competition. Keep it up!
Find your own balance. Keep plugging away at your creative efforts, but stay mentally healthy. I look forward to one day seeing what you create.
Thanks for reading. Be sure to comment down below or on whatever social media you found this on to let me know your thoughts.
If you like reading my stuff, and you want to help support my writing habit, I've signed up for Ko-Fi, which is like an online tip jar. So, no pressure, but if you are feeling so inclined, I would appreciate any amount.
-Anthony
If you have any questions about copyright information or reproduction of this excerpt please check out the copyright page.
If you have any questions about copyright information or reproduction of this excerpt please check out the copyright page.
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